Personal note to self, day 10 is December 3rd. It’s Adem’s birthday, happy birthday Adem, hope you have a great day. Also my nephew Will’s birthday, happy birthday Will, see you soon.

Straight after breakfast (full English with all the trimmings, oh hang on, it was omlette) we left shortly after 9 to go visit Big Brother Mouse. This time is was open and we were beckoned straight in, the young folks eager to capture someone to work with. I sat to work with a young man who proudly informed me he was a monk, and he went off to find a book. I also found out he was 19 and had one brother and two sisters. His spoken English wasn’t brilliant, but he had a pretty good idea of how to read, though when I corrected his pronunciation of some words he questioned me, and I realised quickly that our language makes little sense sometimes. Also the book he had chosen about Greek history did have a rather high number of awkward words in it. I wasn’t sure he understood what some of the words meant so I did a fair bit of miming and explaining. After around an hour my young chap said he had to go and was quickly off. Meanwhile, Mrs Tom had been reading and conversing with a couple of other young chaps before mine had departed, and as I turned to join in she had began with a third who had just come in from school. He was 21 and was in his second year of studying English so his spoken was pretty good. He asked us to explain some words from his exercise book and showed us the work be had been up to. Some pages he had missed because the guest house he works in was busy that day so he didn’t go in to school. He had been a monk already for 3 years but wasn’t any longer, and had once been swept off his feet by an Australian girl who had taken him travelling around Laos and he spoke of her with great affection. Poor lad was a bit besotted. To cheer him up I told him there was an Australian girl who worked in the Tamarind restaurant and maybe she would be just as nice, so I think he might give her a go next. He walked back with us to our guest house and then hopped on his bike and went off to work. It was a great experience being in there with the young people trying to learn English and helping them to do better. Thoroughly recommended.

After Big Brother Mouse we packed up as this was our last day in Luang Prabang and indeed Laos. After packing we dumped our stuff in one of the assigned day rooms and went for a walk along the riverside. We were actually looking for the point where the Mekong meets the Nam Khan as I wanted some pictures, but we walked in completely the wrong direction. Not to be put off we looped back along the main street where we saw Steven, Summer and Darren parked up outside the Joma cafe. We joined them for 20 minutes or so then set off for the riverside again, this time the right way. We quickly found it, but I was also looking for an old bridge built in the communist days, but failed to find it.

Having ran out of time to find the bridge we got back to the hotel bang on leaving time and found everyone else just picking up their things from the day room. En route to the airport we stopped by the Ethanology centre where a guide talked us around a recently opened museum of Lao ethanology. We saw clothes for different groups of people and what sort of places they lived in and courting customs, all very interesting stuff. The Lao people have different ways of classifying themselves, including where they live, the dialect, the religion, ancestry. The different groups often also have different customs and different clothing.

After the Ethanology centre we continued on to the airport and boarded the plane to Hanoi. Unusually for a short flight (approx one hour) we were given something to eat: a couple of ham and cheese rolls, a little donut and some fruit. A fairly uneventful flight all in all.

The transfer to the hotel was much more interesting. Rafaele has a very thorough knowledge of Vietnamese history, and he shared much of this with us on the transfer. For one thing, there is no Vietnam war here, it is called the American war – they wern’t at war with themselves. He must have talked for 20 minutes at least telling stories of how Vietnam came to be were it is today, stretching back a few hundred years. Vietnam has a very interesting history an one which I did not know much about, so I was glad of the lesson.

One thing that is immediately obvious when you get here is the big difference in the numbers of people and how much faster the pace is here. Vietnam is marginally larger than Laos, but Laos’ total population is around 6 million whereas Vietnam is more like 89 million. As a result things are busy and loud. Apparenty there are 40 million motorbikes here too, the primary method for people to get around. Crossing the street is an experience in itself.

We get some practice in crossing the street as we go out for dinner to a place Rafa has booked us in for around 8:15. Around a 15 minute walk we all managed to arrive at the restaurant with only minor injuries and one fatality to speak of. We sit on the roof terrace which is covered and sit cross legged on the floor at a traditional style low table. The food is great and once we’ve paid up however many million dong it is we get a taxi back to the hotel as Rafa goes off out somewhere. We were hoping to be able to find somewhere to have a drink and possibly even buy some supplies for tomorrow’s overnight boat trip, but unless we wanted to go to a karaoke bar we were out of luck. Steven had also scared us off karaoke bars as he’s been reading about “special” ones in his book about China. So, sober, we trundle off to bed having been in a bit of a party mood, though not before checking out Summer’s room as she was keen to share the apparent smell with us. There was no smell, she’s mental.

After breakfast (I’ll let you guess) we set off in our bus at 9:30 headed for the elephant village. Rafa had recommeded this particular place because he felt that this was one of the best as far as the welfare of the elephants goes, which we were all happy with.

Our guide tells us his name is Jey Wan (pronunciation yay-van, spelling guessed) and we get on a tired looking bus from the hotel to the elephant village (oddly, as I’m writing this retrospectively we have just passed the sign to the elephant village a second ago). I soon realise why the bus is a bit knackered as we start to bounce along the the bumpy roads to the site.

Once on site we are pointed to a raised platform where we could sit and wait for our elephants to arrive. We waited a while but then they finally came, elephants with what basically looked like park benches strapped to their backs, the benches sat on a few layers of rugs to cushion the feeling for the elephants. To mount we climbed up onto another platform where we were bench height to allow us to hop across. The guides sit on the very front, pretty much the necks of the elephant. Ours was called Muntim (pronounced moon-teem by our non-English speaking elephant pilot). It was fantastic, and we trekked around for around an hour and a half, plodding through the jungle and eventually across a section of river where our elephant decided to have both a number one and two.

It was a fabulous trek, and once we had finished we bought some bananas to feed to the elephants. Most took them with their trunks, but Muntim hadn’t been trained to do that so we popped it straight into his mouth, though we did feed a number of others via the trunk method.

After feeding time we were back down to the riverbank. Here we were to bathe the elephants, though none of us knew quite what to expect. Here mounting the elephants inolved the elephant lifting its front leg for us to stand on, and we then hopped on as if mounting a horse. The largest elephant was slightly different here, it sat like a dog would sit, and its climber had to scurry up its back. Unforunately Gaynor, a retired lady of a certain age, was tasked with climbing on to this one. Almost inevitably this didn’t turn out too well, so Steven ended up on the big fella. I should mention that this time we were not sat on benches, but on the neck of the elephant as the guides were before, and this time our helpers were behind us commanding the elephants. It’s quite an uncomfortable ride, but bloody good fun.

We wade out into the river and then the guides make them sit down, meaning that we get very wet. The guides are standing now so they are fine, but some us are nearly waist deep. Some of the elephants do more tricks than others, some squirting water, some splashing trunks to create big water showers, it was great fun. Mine didn’t do too much but it was fun enough watching Darren and Steven get drenched, Gaynor and Barry laughing from the side.

It wasn’t long before we were marching back in, but plenty of time to have great fun. The elephants lower themselves again and we hop off, sopping wet, and go for lunch back up at the platform. We discuss our relative experiences while we eat our egg rice with chicken and vegetables. For most of the trek, in fact about 15 minutes into it, Steven had swapped with his guide and was sat up on the neck of the elephant, and remained there the whole way round. I wasn’t offered, and was a bit disappointed as I would have loved to, so was pleased when we got on when we took the elephants bathing. Barry and Gaynor were apparently offered, but declined. After having sat up there for a while whilst out in the river I can say they probably made the right choice given their age, and hats off to Steven for managing over an hour up there. Once lunch was over we hopped back on the bus and back to the hotel.

Still excited from the elephant trip we needed to go pick up our laundry, a not so exciting trip. Yesterday we had taken our dirty stuff to a laundry where they weigh it and you pay 10,000 kip per kilo. Ours was 6.9 kilos and therefore 69,000 kip, around £5.50. However, before we could get our laundry we needed some cash as we had ran out, and had already borrowed 400,000 kip from Barry and Gaynor to pay for our elephant trip. Well, the card didn’t work in the machine, but everyone else, both before and after us, was fine. So, we called the bank and are on hold for 10 minutes before the lady tells me that she cannot discuss Mrs Tom’s card with me because I have entered my security details and not Mrs Tom’s (it is a joint account), even though Mrs Tom is sat next to me and quite willing and able to provide the necessary details. We need to call back and enter the other details. Having informed the lady that this was in fact ridiculous we were transferred to the security team who spoke to Mrs Tom and took the details needed to tell us the card had been blocked due to security concerns. Mrs Tom having made a special trip to our local branch to inform them of our travel plans, we were less than impressed. Note to Lloyds TSB – we will be writing a complaint and you will refund us the £15 in call charges racked up whilst dealing with your stupid red tape and queues. When someone dials the international number, they should be bumped up the queue.

Having stopped at an Internet cafe to sort out our financial woes we had a coffee, then went to collect our washing, finding a bad full of Steven’s pants in with our stuff. We gladly handed them over.

Rafa had told us of a place in Luang Prabang called Big Brother Mouse where visitors can meet with local children and help them to develop their English skills, written, spoken and reading. This was the morning session. The afternoon you could visit to play with the young folks to help them develop naturally through play. We thought this sounded like a great idea so set off in search of Big Brother Mouse. Sadly the children were not there, and we learned that the afternoon play session was not running at the moment, so we decided we would visit in the morning instead.

Our trip to Big Brother Mouse being cut short we were at a loss as to what to do, so Summer, Mrs Tom and I headed into town to peruse the shops before sitting down in a splendid shop that both sold wine in bottles to take away, but also by the glass and bottle to sit in the premises. It was by far the broadest selection of wine I had seen since leaving home with a mass of French wine on offer, most places serving Chillean, Californian if you’re lucky. We had arranged to meet Darren and Steven at 7 so kept an eye out as we sat for over an hour eating snacks and drinking wine, though I had beer cos I’m cool.

During our shop bothering we had booked ourselves a table for dinner in a nice looking place just across the street from where we had just been. Darren and Steven had been missing home foods so when I saw the menu our front with the page open on the steaks I had stopped to look at the offerings. They did a good wide selection of foods and we all had something nice to eat. Darren and Steven both had the steak, I had a soup and a bowl of rice with chilli beef, Mrs Tom had chicken satay (though we did expect somethig a bit nicer as it mentioned curry on the menu) and Summer had BBQ chicken and chips. All in all not that cultural, but what everyone wanted (except me of course, the culture king). We did have some local type fried spring rolls while we waited for our mains which slightly makes up for it I suppose.

Knackered after a couple of energetic days tourism, we packed up early and got a good early night in. I’m going to Vietnam tomorrow Vien! I will pretend that I don’t know you though so I don’t get killed, hope you don’t mind.

After meeting everyone for breakfast (again an omlette with a side plate of fruit) we set off (minus Barry and Gaynor who opt out of the trek part of the trip) in the bus bound for the village where our trek begins. After a 45 minute journey we meet up with our local guide from the village. Sak tells us that although he knows the way it is a rule that a local guide must accompany us. The village is basic as you would expect, but these folks live a little removed from the normal Lao society. The have their own dialect and are descended from Chinese and other immigrants. We see many adorable children and cute dogs and puppies, and even some pigs and chickens. The houses range from thin wooden weave construction with long grass rooves through to brick built places with strong metal based rooves where families have done well and earned enough to afford themselves better living standards.

Once through the village the trek begins proper and we see some beautiful scenery, as well as fields where rice, rubber, teak and several fruits are grown. Although different people own different parts of the land they share what they have, though the majority of what is grown is sold.

Once through the initial part of the walk we trek deeper into the jungle where headroom is low and in many places foot placements are very narrow. We have a couple of drink stops and after our final one move closer to the Kuang Si waterfall.

We reach the top of the waterfall first, with breathtaking views as the water vanishes into clouds of white below. As we navigate the stream crossing, having chosen the wet route, we begin to make our way to the bottom, climbing down steep walkways of footholds carved in the earth. Once on the descention we never really see the waterfall again until we reach the bottom, where we meet with Rafa, Gaynor and Barry. From the bottom the waterfall looks even better with water rapidly tumbling down the rock face into the pools below. Everyone takes a few pictures and we end with Rafa taking a big group shot of us all in front of the falls.

Next some of us have a swim in one of the lower pools, and there is a rope swing into the pool which I use to mark my entrance. It is properly freezing, and takes quite a while to get used to, but is very refreshing after the long walk.

Once dry we take a small walk further downstream to where there is a small bear sanctuary where rescued bears are kept in an enclosure. Much like animals in zoos these guys are obviously in captivity, but are in better circumstances than which they were found. The bears seem a little camera shy and we struggle to get good photos of them but we try nonetheless.

After a quick freshen up at the hotel we wander out into the streets to have another look around the market, and also book our trip for tomorrow, elephant riding. Lunch is a quick bit from the joma cafe and we plod back to the hotel, myself having bought a couple of t-shirts.

Rafa has booked us dinner in a restaurant called Tamarind which is a set menu consisting of some dips with river weed and sesame seed crisps for starters and a huge fish for our main course accompanied by some lettuce and assorted tidbits to go with it. It was absolutely delicious, one of the best meals so far.

Rafa wanted to take us to a club where the locals go, so we hitch a tuk tuk and roll up at the disco, which is in one of the darkest clubs known to man. There is a band on playing traditional Lao songs accompanied by girls singing. I quite enjoy the music, and everyone seems to be having a good time. The dancing system seems a little odd – at the end if every song the floor is cleared and then people tentatively make their way back after the start of the next number, and soon everyone is back in full swing. They also seem to dance in a set routine, rotating round doing a bit of a jiggle facing all four directions. It looks a bit like line dancing, and fun to watch. Steven, Summer and Rafa joined in at various stages, but the rest of us refrained. Barry even fell asleep for a bit such was his approval of the place!

Once out of the club when it closed at 11, Rafa suggested that we go to the bowling alley where we would still be able to get a drink, and if the mood took us have a wee bowl. As it turned out the mood did take us and I ended up winning, being less bad rather than better than everyone else. We got back to the hotel and unfortunately had to wake the owners to let us in. Whoops.

Tomorrow, elephants!

The first thing on the agenda today is a flight to Luang Prabang, the former capital of Laos. Good news is we don’t have to leave until 10:30 so we sleep in until 8:45, get up for breakfast (2x omlette today, paranoid about the sniggering) then pack and get ready to leave for the airport.

Basic is probably how you would describe the Vientiane airport. We take in the shop and then pass through check in. Following this we have a 45 minute wait where we observe the goings on out on the airfield before boarding the 1 hour flight to Luang Prabang. I had enquired why we were flying what compared to the Bangkok to Vientiane train ride seems a short trip. Apparently there are some “mountains” (if that’s what you want to call them) that get in the way and make it a 13 hour drive. No doubt Tim’s Alfa could do it in 2 but I don’t think that the required 11 petrol stations exist en route. The flight passes without incident and we are soon on the ground and on the bus bound for the hotel. I comment that the modes of transport seem to be getting more upmarket as we progress through the tour, this bus being the best so far, and conversely the earlier train in Thailand being a bit “Auschwitz”.

Luang Prabang has a population of around 60,000, around the same as my home town. Imagining it as the former capital is difficult unless you’ve seen the current capital, where things are marginally busier and quicker paced.

Having checked in to the hotel (a very nice quiet little place made up of a few blocks of appartments) we get straight out again and meet Sak who is to be our guide during our stay in Luang Prabang. A gentle and quiet man (as most Lao people seem to be) he leads us to some places where we can get some takeaway lunch to take on our boat trip to the Pak Ou caves. The caves were originally made by the sea thosands of years ago (though the country has no sea borders any longer) and became places of worship, some locals still believing that they house spirits. At some time they were inhabited by monks though not today, the monks having taken up residence in more comfy surroundings. There are hundreds of different sized Buddha statues in both upper and lower caves, the latter being at the top of a lot of steep steps which cause much wheezing and puffing.

After the caves we sail across the river to the Pak Ou village (sharing its name with the caves) where they make laolao whiskey. The stuff we sample is excellent, and with an eye on an upcoming train journey a few bottles are acquired. We buy a small bottle to take home to show our chums back home which is in a nice looking bottle that Mrs Tom will likely use later to make impressive things for parties. Like some other spirits I’ve seen elsewhere there are bottles with snakes, spiders, insects and other crazy things all jammed inside, and we’re td these are all gathered locally to be used in the bottling.

Back on the boat we head back to Luang Prabang. All around us on the boat trip the scenery is beautiful, full of mountains and green, and lots of snaps are taken. On the way back, the sun is setting and we all try to capture this from various different angles. I got a shot which includes a rather impressive looking wake in the river as a faster craft had just whizzed by leaving its trail. I immidiately show off and bore people with it. Just before disembarking, Darren leans backwards into what he believes is the side of the boat, but is actually the doorway. Being certain for an unexpected bath I grab his arm and haul him safely back over the threshold, and am henceforth carried shoulder high through the town and given the freedom of Laos*.

*There is a good chance some of this is made up. I did stop him falling in though.

After a quick stop back at the hotel where we say goodbye to Sak for the day we are off to the night markets. There are many lovely little trinkets and goods on sale, much better and more attractive than the typical tourist junk you see so much of, and we wander through taking it all in. Our intended destination is the food section of the market where we will eat tonight. Freshly cooked meats, fish, vegetables, soups, rice dishes, curries are all on display. Having been fortunate enough to grab a spot where we can all sit together, each of us takes a wander and picks up different bits and pieces to eat, myself opting for a pork noodle soup, some skewered barbecued chicken, some chicken and vegetable kebabs and a couple of tomatoes stuffed with minced meat and noodles. Mrs Tom also has skewered chicken, adding some of the kebabs and some skewered pork. Of course we have a couple of Beer Lao too. Everyone enjoys their food before we clear out and head for the bakery stalls for some cakes, which we take into the neighbouring coffee shop to eat with a cup of coffee (though summer has what turns out to be an outstanding hot chocolate).

As we head back to the hotel through the market we take another look at the offerings, and Darren decides to buy a hat to keep the sun off his head on our trip tomorrow, replacing the one that if I’m honest I saw he’d left next to the computer in the last hotel but forgot to tell him. Back at the hotel we have a quick drink before what will be an early start tomorrow morning for our trip – a 4 hour trek ending up at the Kouang Si waterfall.

Day 5 started by us being woken by a chap from the train nudging us to let us know that breakfast was ready. Despite being in a compartment which was not very wide and certainly not long enough for my full gangliness, I slept pretty well. Maybe the beers helped. Mrs Tom however says that she didn’t sleep so well. Swings and roundabouts eh. Breakfast, as we had opted for “western” rather than “Asian” was eggs, some funky sausage things cut into flower shapes, pineapple, ham and some bread, with coffee and some squash. Not too bad, but the sort of food I would normally shy away from. Having just began to regain my appetite I hoped for the best and knocked it back. Mrs Tom though ate relatively little.

The train pitched in to the station around 9 having been scheduled to arrive an hour earlier. Apparently it doesn’t go above around 50 km/h (actually) so it’s not quick, but it was quite fun. Also fun was the tuk tuk ride from the station to the boarder. The tuk tuk can comfotably seat 4, but not 4 with at least one massive bag each, but that’s what we did. One with Barry, Gaynor, Darren and Rafa, the other with Steven, Summer, Mrs Tom and myself. We watched with delight as Rafa climbed on the back of the tuk tuk in front and the whe thing tilted backwards, front wheel in the air. Having managed, somehow, to cram us all in and get going, the tuk tuk drivers decided we needed visas, which we already had, so stopped us at a roadside establshment where they apparently try to hard sell you visas. We quickly told them politely we were fine thank you very much and moved on to the boarder.

Immigration, it seems, is shit no matter where you go in the world. Things always seem to take far longer than they need to and this was no exception. Once through, we fill in some sort of “honest guv I’m not ill or nuffink” form which entitles us to a delightful little card stating as much, and we soon board our bus. Rafa fills us in with some facts along the way and I remember what he told us during our welcome meeting. More bombs were dropped on Laos during the Vietnam war (though Laos did not partake) than were dropped worldwide during the whole of the second world war. This turns out to be around one bombing run every 8 seconds. For 9 years.

Driving through Vientiane you wouldn’t think it was the capital city of the country, and with only around 134,000 people it’s obvious why. There is a relaxed, slow pace about the people and their movements. They are quiet and extremely polite, and staff in shops, cafes, bars and restaurants are eager to please. We go for lunch before check in as we are a little early and the food is great, and the coffee very good too.

After check in we meet with (again proununciation only) Tui who is our local guide for the small tour of Vientiane. A very enthusiastic man, Tui is a pleasure to be with. We start with tours of temples – Wat Si Saket, Wat Phra Kaew and Wat Si Muang (?). Tui talks us round the interesting artifacts and gives us all the information we need to be able to take in the history of the beautiful temples.

We move on to Pha That Kuang ‘World Precious Stupa’ which is an enourmous gold monument. Stupas are usually small and contain the remains of the cremated dead, but here they are on a different scale. The main piece of the monument is the largest, surrounded by 30 smaller Stupas. We walk around it having climbed around halfway up it, again Tui filling us in.

Patuxai is next, also known as the vertical runway. This looks a lot like the arc de triumphe in Paris, and has its nickname because it was built in 1969 with cement donated by the Americans which was supposed to be used to help build the new airport. Tui tells us there are 147 steps to the top (I started to count but got lost so I’m afraid this important fact goes unverified) and we climb every one of them for a fantastic view of Vientiane.

I’ve missed something. Yes, definitely. Oh yes, the singing, that’s it. On the way to Patuxai Tui asked if we would like to hear some traditional Lao singing. Silly question, of course we would. He began singing about Luang Prabang, but was interrupted by the untimely arrival of our final sightseeing destination, so he continued once we re-alighted the bus. Once the song had finished and we had given a deserved round of applause, he asked if we knew Michael Jackson. So he sang us some snippets from his favourite Michael Jackson tunes. It was a great end to a great little excursion.

Dinner was at Makphet. Makphet means chilli in Lao and is part of the Peuen Mit Street Children project. It is kind of like the Fifteen project started by Jamie Oliver. Children are educated and taken off the streets and taught to cook wonderful modern food in the restaurant. We had a great dinner here and left a tip which goes directly to the students. There is also a shop which sells gifts made by the parents of the children who work in the restaurant where a couple of our group, including Mrs Tom, bought gifts for folks back home.

After dinner Rafa took us to a bar which was close to the river. Aprehensive as we walked through the door, after climbing a few flights of steps we stepped out into quite a nice, but heavily westernised bar. The music was stuff that we recognised and the drinks and food menus reflected the western influence too, and as a result many of the people in the bar were non Lao folk, but we still had a good time. Rafa and I spoke about a number of topics including religion and football holiganism and I thoroughly enjoyed it. In Italy they don’t see hooligans as jus being troublemakers, the term also refers to those who organise the singing, banners and flags which are such an impressive feature of Italian football matches.

We meandered back to the hotel trying to follow Rafa’s directions (he had retired a little earlier). With myself and Darren up front we were doing our best to navigate the streets of Vientiane and get us back to our hotel. Thankfully at last everyone seemed to recognise where they were, though I wasn’t convinced as I didn’t recognise it at all, but we did managed to get back and retire safely.

Day 6 breakfast was a nice late start as today was essentially a free day. Rafa had asked if we would like to visit the COPE foundation (though this was not on the itinerary) and having all agreed we had decided to leave at 10:30, giving us all a nice lay in. I plumped for the traditional Asian breakfast of rice noodles with pork (very nice, though even the staff gave me funny looks for which I couldn’t work out why), and Mrs Tom took the safe option of omlette.

Though I slept ok, Mrs Tom didn’t. There is a construction site right next to our room, and our bathroom has windows which separate our room from the site only by mesh to keep out the flying nasties. They also start cleaning the rooms very early (around 6:30), and the site starts playing their radio at around 7. Seemingly everyone else doesn’t suffer the construction noise in the same way, so we’ve rather shat out there.

COPE is a palce where they make prosthetic limbs for people who have suffered the consequences of the disgusting and needless bombing campaign by the Americans during the Vietnam war. Close to 600,000 bombing runs were made by American planes to bomb Lao, each resulting in hundreds of “bombies” being dropped and several large scale destruction missiles. A bombie is a small bomb around the size of a cricket ball containing explosives and in some cases ball bearings.

Around 30% of bombs dropped failed to detenate, and remain live and armed all across Laos. Because of the nature of the climate and the rainy seasons, as well as the 30 years that have passed since the war, many are covered and hidden. Farmers trying to make honest work lose their lives and limbs, children find bombies and play with them and find the same ends. There is also the illegal scrap metal trade. People can earn good money for the trade of scrap metal, so adults risk their lives, in different cases both aware and ignorant of the dangers they face, digging up bombs for sale as scrap. Children do the same trying to earn money for their families. Sadly this causes the loss of many lives every year.

The economic result is that Laos cannot grow. In order for construction, farming, infrastructure building to all take place, people have to put their lives at risk because of the possibility of encountering bombs. Another fact which I did not know was that this bombing campaign was referred to as “the secret war” as it was hidden from western people for 6 years. Even then very little information about what was happening made it back to the west.

At the end of the film we watched a young boy says “the bombs do not belong to us, we want the Americans to take them back.”

It was also explained to us that although primarily COPE provides limbs (and specially customised wheelchairs) for bomb victims, they also assist those who need their help because of accident or illness. Please look them up, they sell merchandise and you can donate to them, they do an amazing job.

After lunch we took a walk of the markets to wear off our food before going for a traditional Lao massage. The markets, if I’m honest, were not my cup of tea. An indoor complex consisted of many many stalls where you can buy everything from household goods to food, clothing, jewellery, white goods etc. It was a bit smelly in places and there were plenty of flies around the meat stalls, so we finished up looking around and set off for our massage.

Rafa had recommended a particlar place, so after a bit of guesswork with the map we found it. They could only accomodate 3 at a time, so Summer and Mrs Tom went in whilst Darren, Steven and myself went for a drink. The girls gave good feedback so when it was our turn Steven (who had never had a massage before) and I went in, and Darren opted out (also never having had a massage before), deciding he could do with a sleep instead.

The massage itself was not quite what I expected, though still very enjoyable. It was a bit of a test of my body’s elasticity as there was a lot of twisting and stretching with some quite intense finger work on all the different muscle areas. I was convinced Steven had nodded off as there was a rather intense snoring noise coming from very nearby, but he assures me he heard it too, so someone else was clearly very relaxed. We left with enough time back at the hotel to have a little nap before dinner.

We gathered in the lobby and set off for a short walk to our dinner destination. Most of us found the menu system awkward but we eventually all chose something. Mostly the food was enjoyable, and Mrs Tom and I had a lovely time chatting to Gaynor and Brian. We all drank a little more than we intended to, including some laulau whiskey, a very smooth but exceptional tasting clear whiskey which though it doesn’t taste so was apparently around 40-50%.

Thankfully Rafa was able to lead us back to digs to avoid any recurrences of our unplanned travels from the night before.

Day four begins with what for us is an early start, needing to be up and ready by 9am, including having all of our things packed. We manage this, as well as making breakfast, and meet with the others to leave on our private boat tour of the river and canals.

Our local guide, whose name is pronounced (though defintely not spelled) “On” tells us about the history of the river, how it used to be the border of Bangkok and how the King ordered the kinks to be straightened, where the navy bases were, where the royal barge museum was, and many other wonderful facts about Thailand’s River of Kings. We even had time to stop to feed the catfish, buying some bread from some locals to entice what looked like hundreds of catfish to the surface for a tasty snack.

Once out of the boat we were guided to Wat Po, a temple and site of an enormous reclining Buddha, 46 metres long. On guided us around the different parts of the temple wonderfully, filling in the facts and painting the history for us. Having visited the Grand Palace without a guide it was great to have one with us to give a local perspective on things.

On left us after the temple tour and all of our group except for Summer went to the main shopping centre to see what we could see. Not a great deal to interest us as it turned out, though it was quite an impressive place. I did manage to get some clippers to get the old toenails in order which had sadly been left just a little too long for good taste. As it transpired, Summer had had lunch with On our guide and had a great time, and had imparted yet more of her local wisdom over lunch. Summer was left very impressed.

Darren, Steven and Summer all took the boat back (not sure what Barry and Gaynor did) whilst Mrs Tom and I got a cab back with a rather enthusiastic Chelsea FC supporting cabbie who was full of fun and laughter, so the trip was a good one.

Once back at the hotel we had a nap and then went down to the pool where I sat in the shade and Mrs Tom went for a swim. Darren and Steven joined us at the poolside, Steven opting to join in with the swimming. I think if he’s honest he’d say it was too bloody cold the same as I did. As it turned out Summer was having a massage overlooking us, where we’re told only one part of her was left untouched by human hand. Yeah.

At 6pm we gathered for our bus to the station, where we deposited our bags with Rafa on the dirty platform (I think the trains are diesel fuelled) and went to get some food for dinner. We all took Rafa’s recommendation of a Thai place but none of us knew the system. We had to buy coupons for meals (don’t understand why) and then after much queuing and uncertainty, we were able to place our orders and eventually receive our food. I think I was the only person who got something completely different from what they ordered, but it wasn’t too bad. In true form Mrs Tom managed to spill a large amount of her food on herself.

Once aboard the train we settled into our seats and began chatting and got into good spirits. Rafa ordered some beers (getting to like this chap) and after a while we moved down to the bar carriage. This was nothing quite like I’d ever seen before. All carriage windows were fully open, and people were smoking, drinking, eating and generally having a good time in what at best is a grotty train carriage with a few tables and chairs. This is where we spent the remainder of the evening until we were asked to leave by the man in a police uniform. To this moment though Rafa has still not returned. Quite what he has that the rest of us don’t I don’t know, though he was in conversation with a Thai man so perhaps he has been excused the formalities we were subject to.

Mrs Tom and I met a couple of other tourists who it appeared at first were travelling together, but had only met on the train. A German man called Benjamin and a Dutch lady whose name I can neither remember properly, or likely spell if I could. Both were travelling to the same destination, the Dutch lady to spend three months away without plans, and Benjamin to kayak down the river from Luang Prabang around 3-400km. Fine, you might imagine. Assuming he’s got the right experience right? Well Benjamin has only ever really been kayaking on calm flat waters, not really white water, which is apparently quite a large chunk of his trip. And lots of rocks in the river too. Good luck Benjamin, I hope you make it ok.

So now we are all in bed (except for Rafa) and looking forward to our first day in Laos. Depending on how people feel in the morning, we can either do the tourist bit tomorrow or the day after. Right now I think it’s only likely to be Rafa that may want to put things off…..!

Sawat dee krap, Thailand.